Waiting...

If you're part of a DD couple, you might think you know exactly what this post will be encompassing. You're only half right.  I will talk about how I hate waiting for punishment. I don't like the anxiety, the fear (depending on the "crime" committed), and the guilt that can build up. 

But first... Another waiting that I hate.  I know, it's the job of a firewife... And every dd wife, to support her husband. (Really every wife, but I don't know that that's always the case...) 
I wait. Patiently. But I hate it. 

He's only on a volunteer department, but he goes on every call that he can. Thankfully (and hopefully not jinxing) they don't get many structure fires. 

My fireman is also on the department at his work. They, too, don't get many calls. Those are more mandatory that he attend, but they are quite infrequent.

He always tries to let me know if he's going on a call and we aren't together and I greatly appreciate that. I definitely wouldn't want to find out after. 

Tonight, he went to cover for a different station while they have their Christmas party. Next weekend, they'll return the favor for my fireman's station's party. I knew they would have at least one call. It seems that station is always busier than ours. 

I got a sitter for #3, but I took our girls to a Christmas show. We had a great time, but I kept my phone in my lap. I knew I'd get a text saying he was going on a call. I try to not worry. I know that worrying never helps anything and they train like a paid full-time department would. I know nothing about fire departments, but I know my fireman's is a really good one. They train once a week on such a variety of topics. The training really does make me feel better. And while I do despise training nights because I'm selfish, lol, deep down I know it's for the best. 

I got the text around 9. Because I had no alternate choice, I waited, again, patiently. 43 minutes later, I got a reassuring "all is well" type text. I felt like I could breathe again. 

I know all other wives of husbands who do things like this worry and have these feelings. And then there are military wives. They are amazing in my book.  In fact, after writing about how I only have to worry on a somewhat infrequent basis, I feel silly posting about it after thinking about military wives. Their strength is indescribable.  Always support our troops!! :) 

Waiting for him reminded me how impatient I can be. I hate waiting for punishment. If I know it's coming, I just want it to happen. We always have to wait until all the kids are asleep, which can add to how much time I have to wait. We do generally try to get them in bed early and on a good schedule, but still. If I know it's coming, waiting for him to decide when is sometimes killer! The waiting can make the actual spanking even worse, I think.  If I had my choice, I'd always pick now :)


I think after this waiting tonight, I'm definitely going to need some maintenance soon. Very soon! 


Xo! 
~Elle :)