Monday, October 27, 2014

Ladies & gentlemen... He is back :)

We had a jam-packed, slammed busy weekend. Well, Friday and Saturday at least. Sunday was fantastic. We attended church, a yummy breakfast, then sat on our couch and watched our football team WIN! LOL, we watched a really good movie and ended our Sunday like we usually do.... Walking Dead. 

I wasn't that impressed with last night's episode, but I'm a Daryl fan. So when Daryl is absent from the episode, it's not as good for me, lol. I did like that some of the events that occurred (no spoilers for any of you who haven't seen it yet!), but I want to know what happens next. I'm so impatient! 
Just to be fair, I am a fan of Lauren Cohan too, lol. FM & I agree this picture is hottt.  

Last week was a game-changer for us. My post made me realize just how much I missed ttwd. I texted FM. We talked.. and talked. We talked about the bad habit of his and how I want him to stop. He is working on it, but it's not gone as I wish it was. He says I don't understand addiction. I guess I don't. My feeling is just stop. Sure it will suck, but not forever and you'll be rid of the habit. We agree to disagree and I let it go. I really did. He doesn't do it around me and I really am trusting that he truly is trying to quit. 

I asked him at what extent he wants ttwd back.  All of it, but he realizes that's not what I want. Wrong, that is what I want, it's just the bad habit. He says he will take whatever he can get. Halfway, all of it, anything. He just wants it back. I compromise or give in.. or both. We can do whatever you want, with the promise that you really will continue to work on quitting.  

So ttwd is back... or we will see. We are trying it out, no major rules no giant leap in. We are just going with it. I think we aren't stressing out about it or trying to make it something it's not. 

Monday night we had a really good session. The following morning I asked him for feedback, something I always did when we were ttwd'ing before. It was exactly what I needed.  Me too FM, me too. 

So the rest of the week goes along smoothly, no problems. No sessions, even though I would've loved one (or 6, lol) more in there. We are already noticeably closer. It's that gravitational pull. It's back.  Fireworks. Only you guys know that feeling. You can't explain it to anyone else, not that I would ever try. 

The week kind of flew by. We had so much going on and Halloween activities this weekend. Saturday was nothing but me in the car. A little bit of spending time with the kids mixed in, but not much. 

Cue the blue flashing lights behind me while I was driving at one point. While I'm on the phone with FM. Expletive. Seriously, expletive lol.  That's not what I got pulled over for though, that's not illegal in the state I was in. At least not yet. Speeding. Something FM is always telling me to be cautious of. Can't help it! I have places to go and people to see! 

Luckily, I am an excellent driver :insert me with a sweet smile: and I have no tickets, no anything on my record. The police officer lets me go with just a warning, PtL! I do not have time for a ticket, nor any extra money I want to put toward paying a ticket with the holidays coming up! 

I call FM back to let him know what happened. That's fantastic that they didn't give you a ticket, love. You're still in trouble. 

All-caps expletive. Oh, that's right. We are back with ttwd in full-force.  I begin to explain my case. Yeah, I don't really want to hear it. It's a nice try. You're still in trouble. 

At this point, I'm just glad I made it through that day. So many stressful things leading up to the events that were taking place that day and I really did manage through them effortlessly. Except the damn cop that happened to pass me while I was coming-down-a-hill-while-driving-slightly-faster-than-I-should've-been <-- that's for FM, lol. :) 

Honestly, at this point I'm wondering if he'll actually hold up his end. His track record is not the best with consistency and punishment. Especially with punishment.  I didn't say much about it after I got home and we all had dinner. I think we may have watched some tv together with the kids before they ended up falling asleep watching a rented movie. I got a shower and he sent me to our room. 

I was pleasantly surprised with how he handled it. He started out with no warm-up.. ouch, but I did understand.  I protested about it, but he quickly reminded me that I was in trouble.  He lectured a little (which is more than he would've done in the past!!) and place his hand a little more forceful than he would've in the past too. (A little? A lot. but it was kind of hot along with getting his point across.)  He did take it easy and ended a lot sooner than I had anticipated, but I think he's still figuring things out for himself too.  

I do always try to be honest and give him any feedback he wants. I think we have this under our belts and we know how we messed up in the past. I really do think he's trying this time and not just doing it for me or because he thinks I want to. Not that I really think that's what was happening before, but I was afraid that's how it was.  

So, we will see how this goes. I'm not stressing out about it like I have in the past. I'm not asking for a specific list of rules, I think obviously I know the difference between right and wrong and I know mostly what he likes and doesn't. I think that will make a big difference too. 

Hope you all had a great weekend! 
xo, 
Elle







12 comments:

  1. This made me smile..well all except for the ticket. Something you both want..and are willing to work at...sounds like a winning combination.
    hugs abby

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    1. Thanks Abby! Thankfully, just a warning and no ticket.. or I have a feeling I'd *still* be in trouble, lol!

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  2. Hi Elle, I am so glad you are back where you should be!

    Naughty girl for using the phone whilst driving! Can't do it here in England! You certainly wouldn't get let off.

    That picture of the brush looks remarkably like the one Dan broke whilst spanking me a year ago! Never replaced it. Sadly, now have a small round bath brush which is far far worse.LOL

    I don't think I would go so far as to have a list of rules - not yet anyway. Just start with an understanding of what is expected. That's what works for us. I am sure you will soon settle back into a good place. And message for Fireman - kick the smoking!!! Yuck! Bad boy! I have a wooden spoon with your name on it!

    Many hugs Elle,
    Ami

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    1. You have to be mindful here of which state you're in. I live on the edge of one state, close to two others. I can be in 3 states EASILY more than once each day, one of which you cannot talk on the phone at all. No texting in any of them, but it's still okay to talk. :)

      FM broke a similar brush too, lol. This isn't our exact one, but it's close.

      I don't think we will ever have a specific list again. That's just too rigid for us and we are honestly- and admittedly by both- flakey on stuff like that.
      Thanks Ami :)

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  3. It sounds like things are sweet at your house.
    Meredith

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    1. Going pretty well here!! Thanks Meredith!

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  4. Hi Elle, so happy to read this and so glad things are getting back on track with you two.

    That was lucky not getting a ticket. I have a lead foot lol. Can't talk on the phone while driving here either, unless it's hands free.

    Hugs
    Roz

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    1. Very lucky! I thought for sure I would get one. But, I was honest with the officer and said I just wasn't paying attention. I was coming down a bit of a hill, but I still thought I'd get one! Thank goodness!

      I have a bit of a lead foot too.. lol
      Thanks!!

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  5. Hope you don't mind a new comment! Ive just been reading through a few blogs for a few months, and came across all these blogs!
    We have somewhat of the same dynamic here, we don't really call it anything but it's sometimes off and on and back again.
    We don't really have a lot of rules, mostly respect things.
    Oh and the phone while driving is always a huge no no! LOL

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    1. I'm always appreciative of new comments!!! Welcome and thanks for reading!
      I actually thought we might have a specific rule about the phone in the car, but no. I think he knows I get so bored when I'm driving. Especially if the kids are watching a movie!!!

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  6. Elle,

    So happy he is back, and ttwd back in full swing too, that is awesome! I think its a good idea to not stress, let him find his groove.
    And btw, not to toot my own horn or anything, but I have never been pulled over or gotten a ticket! insert cheesy grin :D

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    1. Me too!!!

      LOL :) It's a nice thing to be able to say! No tickets ever! Unfortunately I have the two pull-overs, on the same stinking road no less! But no ticket! lol! :)

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