Saturday, March 2, 2013

Definition of HoH ..

Hez over at Love and Submission posted a really good question yesterday:

What is your definition/meaning/role of an Hoh?

The minute I read it, I texted Fireman.  It was too good not to ask immediately.  Plus, there's no way I'd remember to ask him in 5 hours after he got home from work, lol.  Hez requested the HoH give their answer, too.  I knew he'd help out.  

A short 15 minutes after I texted her question to him, I had the response. 
*I think HoH is, the leader of the pack, the pater familia, ceo and coo of the family organization.  He is the go-to individual for all things.  He sets the rules, limitations, and breaks all ties.  In many circumstances, too many "chiefs" create disorganization.  HoH is THE cheif, the one and only.  It's his responsibility to after all, to make sure everything with "his" house is as it should be.  Not that he can't delegate, but everything ultimately falls back on him.*

 I agreed with his statements.  I think we all have heard two people can't drive the car.  I just wonder is it 51/49? Is it 60/40? 70/30? Does any of that matter? I kind of think maybe it doesn't.. but I don't know.  

All I know is, I couldn't have picked a better HoH for me.  I'm lucky.  We've been on this journey for going on 5 months.  While that's just a small amount of time in the big scheme of things, it's made a huge difference for us.  


  1. That was a great response from Fireman. My Daddy's was similar and made me smile.

    So happy you are seeing the benefits of ttwd.

  2. That's a good response and I'm happy for you both :)
    I'm curious now what Tm's response would be.

  3. Hey Elle...wonderful response from your Fireman and very true. Doesn't matter what the could be 49.99/49.01 but bottom line...he's the captain of your ship and it's working very well for both of you! ;)


  4. Hi Elle, I agree, that was a great response from Fireman, I think it captures the essence of the role beautifully. You guys are in a good place. Happy for you!


  5. Hi Elle,

    That was such a great response to the question. And it helped a lot too for my hoh to understand what is his role. Thank you so much for taking the time to ask and post.


  6. Your guy put some thought into this. Wise words.

  7. That was a great reply. :) Guess you have a keeper there. ;)

  8. Nice answer from fireman! I think it depends on the couple for sure and the situation. For example, if it's in the bedroom we're like 90/10. If we're at a friend's, we're about 51/49, if it's just us but we're doing something fun, it's 65/ many scenarios!

  9. I think the definition sounds just about perfect! Even CEO's need help, have off days, can be team players; but at the end of the day, they make the final call and take the final responsibility.