Reflecting..

I took another day away from blogger yesterday. I actually even tried to stay away from Facebook too. My fb friends are getting slightly annoying.. Especially one 20ish year old who I can't delete, because we are related, but feels the need to post every single thought she has every few minutes. It's no wonder she can't get keep a job. She can't stay away from posting the dumbest things on Facebook. Not my point... Lol 

Anyway, I truly appreciate all of your heartfelt comments on my last post, and fireman does too. He told me last night while I was otb/otk, but I'll get there in a minute. 

I don't like being in the place that I was when I wrote the last post. I hate feeling that way, I hate thinking that way.. And I definitely hate being distant from my favorite person in the world.  We reconnected the night I posted that, but then yesterday fell back into the spiral of doom. A few texts misinterpreted and taken the wrong way... With replies that didn't help anything since they were misinterpreted anyway.. It was a mess. 

We got past it way faster than usual. Chalk another one up for ttwd. 

He sent a mood changing text. *I'm sorry for the misunderstanding and confusion.*

*It's just frustrating because it seems like we are never on the same page with the dd stuff.*

*Ok. Explain.* 

* I don't know. We just aren't.* (I wasn't trying to be vague. I was trying to get the kids lunch and text him at the same time. It was hard to focus, but we were communicating effectively, so I didn't want to stop!!) 

*Well, Monday was a disaster. Last night (Tuesday) was what it was, though all day it had been my intention to spank. So I figured we'd try tonight. All I know is to jump back in and do it every opportunity we get. But I think we have to get back on the same page. We have to. Do you agree?* 

Seriously, I have the greatest husband ever. I know, I say that all the time, lol. But it's true. 

After everything settled that evening, I got a good workout in, we got the kids in bed, he said let's go to our room. I didn't exactly know he meant for a spanking, lol. It was late, so I just climbed up into bed like normal.. Then he turned the light on lol. I was like a deer in headlights. 

I got into position and he started talking. I thought of how Emi said H likes to get her into spanking position, then have a discussion. It was exactly that way. But, I liked it. It made me completely focus on what he was trying to say. No distractions like iPhones or iPads, television or kids, there weren't even other thoughts trying to overtake his words in my head. I was listening. 

He asked for my input a couple times, while rubbing and sometimes squeezing. We were close, too. Close in proximity, close emotionally. This new, weird positioning of over his knee, over the bed, his left arm horizontally on my back, right arm delivering the contact to my presented behind. It works. 

She just needs blonde hair to be me, lol

He broke my hairbrush.. Lol. Not this time, but the time before, so he got creative with another household item. It was definitely a stress reliever and I was reminded that hanging up on him was is a rule. The new household item makes a lasting impression. I think I'm still feeling it today... 

Things are much better here. I think Submissive Elle is even back from her long vacation! :) 

Xo! 

Elle